A friend of mine recently started his own blog, which reminded me I've been neglecting mine. I would say I've been busy, but the truth is I simply have not made it a priority. Which brings me to my topic. One of my pet peeves is when people tell me they are sorry about neglecting something in our friendship which they feel they need to apologize for. It could be something as simple as not returning a phone call, or something as involved as not talking for a majority of their friends for months. Here is my advice: stop analyzing your apology. Many women would agree that we would rather have others act in a way that doesn't require an apology. However, since that is nearly impossible for everyone, simply apologize and say it wasn't a priority.
Now, before anyone gets their panties in a wad...here is my explanation of that. The reality is, whenever I don't accomplish something in my life in the timeframe I want to complete it in, it's because I haven't made it a priority. This applies to everything and everyone. We all have priorities in life. If a friend doesn't call in awhile, who am I to be angry with that friend when she or he has other things in her/his life which have taken priority over me? Am I that important? The hard answer is no. My human response is to be somewhat upset that my friend is neglecting to acknowledge me. That is forgivable.
The reality is, I do it as well. I screen calls sometimes, I wait to return calls or texts when I don't have the time, or can't make the time right then to make that person a priority. I know that priorities can change. Just because someone is high on my priority list now, doesn't mean they remain there. It's likely that life events make them more of a focus. It is also easier to make those who are logistically close to us a priority over those who live farther away. We all say we will call or write (text), but out of sight can truly become out of mind. It doesn't mean we forget others, they just aren't on our immediate radar because we are not in the same place anymore.
The reason for my post today is to apologize to anyone I've been neglecting lately, and say I'm sorry for not making you a priority. If I were to have a New Year's Resolution, it would be that. I love talking to my friends and want to make my social family more of a priority. When I do that, I'm more positive and things in my life seem easier since I have people to lean on, laugh with, and cry to. In the spirit of Christmas, I guess what I'm offering is more of myself: More time, more acknowledgement, and more love. It's up to you to accept the gift.
Now, before anyone gets their panties in a wad...here is my explanation of that. The reality is, whenever I don't accomplish something in my life in the timeframe I want to complete it in, it's because I haven't made it a priority. This applies to everything and everyone. We all have priorities in life. If a friend doesn't call in awhile, who am I to be angry with that friend when she or he has other things in her/his life which have taken priority over me? Am I that important? The hard answer is no. My human response is to be somewhat upset that my friend is neglecting to acknowledge me. That is forgivable.
The reality is, I do it as well. I screen calls sometimes, I wait to return calls or texts when I don't have the time, or can't make the time right then to make that person a priority. I know that priorities can change. Just because someone is high on my priority list now, doesn't mean they remain there. It's likely that life events make them more of a focus. It is also easier to make those who are logistically close to us a priority over those who live farther away. We all say we will call or write (text), but out of sight can truly become out of mind. It doesn't mean we forget others, they just aren't on our immediate radar because we are not in the same place anymore.
The reason for my post today is to apologize to anyone I've been neglecting lately, and say I'm sorry for not making you a priority. If I were to have a New Year's Resolution, it would be that. I love talking to my friends and want to make my social family more of a priority. When I do that, I'm more positive and things in my life seem easier since I have people to lean on, laugh with, and cry to. In the spirit of Christmas, I guess what I'm offering is more of myself: More time, more acknowledgement, and more love. It's up to you to accept the gift.
Gives you something to think about. I sometimes find myself overthinking what someone's thoughts are when they don't answer the phone call or IM. Usually I think of sensitivity as a woman thing, but men too.
ReplyDeleteWell said. I'm stealing your blog. LOL
ReplyDelete